Monochopsis - “The subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place.”
When I put together my look for this weeks blog, it was a matter of how I am feeling; disassociated/invisible. I threw on clothing in muted tones and loose shapes because it gave me comfort while feeling the discomfort of the not belonging to the outside world.
When I am in a dissociative state of mind the only thing that makes me present are my feet planted to the ground, hence the not so neutral leopard print ankle boots. There is a strangely dissatisfying yet satisfying notion about feeling out of place. On one hand everything happening around me isn't bothersome, while on the other I get too stuck in my own head. It’s like floating around aimlessly, getting on with the things I have to, literally only because I have to and living another life in my mind. In a way it’s like going window shopping, you know you aren't going to buy anything because well, funds, yet you feel the urge to spend spend spend. Outwardly, you are out of place because inwardly you can’t buy the things you want.
So, my clothes are my armour, they have the capacity to make me feel safe. This Topshop bouclé coat is one of my favourite purchases for Autumn Winter ‘18 so far, it’s as if though I am in a cocoon all warm and cosy, ideal for the up and coming cold stretch (although you couldn't tell, given its currently 22 degrees celsius as I write this). Everyone loves a good old oversized jumper, I chose this beige turtleneck from H&M. The colour really sums up how I am seeing everything around me, muted and blurred with a touch of haziness. The white denim culottes are also from H&M, they are UNBELIEVABLY relaxed, I literally could live in them all day everyday. I kept it classic and minimal with my accessories, opting for my 10 year old Chanel bag so as to let the shoes do all the talking.
Observing everything passing by your line of sight is odd when you know you can’t do anything about your thoughts which go along with it. Right now, the world of Amira I am living in, is because I am processing a number of big changes in my life and frankly doing so really doesn't make me feel present, anywhere I go. The only way I know how to navigate this subtle and persistent feeling of being out of place, is to see where it takes me, even just through my clothes.
Shop the Look:
White Bouclé Coat - Topshop
White Denim Culottes - Similar here
Beige Oversized Jumper - H&M, similar here
Leopard Print Boots - Zara, similar here
Sunglasses - Celine, similar here
Photography by Hayley Ku’unani @thoualone