Hoping is born from both negative and positive situations. Honestly without it over the years I definitely wouldn't have gained some of things I really wanted. The old saying “if you don’t ask, you don't get” comes to mind, and when you think about it, asking is the same as hoping. Woah, totally just got into a head spiral over that thought.
Anyway… existential thought process over, lately I have neglected discussing anything mental health, which is very much part of my every day. If you have read some of my blog posts already you'll know that I am diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and if you haven’t, well, now you know. I suppose the topic isn't one I can just whip out in a blog about a guide to buying the cosiest coats now, can I? In any case, I wanted to take this topic as an opportunity to point out why I really believe in the importance of hoping.
Given the nature of being extremely depressed, it’s a no brainer that one would lose ALL hope about everything. That includes living, which yes, is very deep but very very true. I have had periods of time where I stopped believing anything good could ever happen to me, frankly because I didn't see the point anymore. It’s a dark and abyss like feeling. Coming out of that mood and state of mind sheds new light on the positive things about life. I see them differently and with more hope than if I didn't come out from that black vacuous hole.
As I set out on this blogging path I am hopeful for all the things I can get out of doing it. For example, I hope to own this beautiful coat from Verheyen London one day. I want to keep buying the luxury items I am total sucker for whether thats straight from the store itself or second hand from places like Vestiaire Collective. I hope to become the presence I am aiming to be and make a living out of this. The thing is too, I can only hope about these possibilities because I can’t foresee my future and what it may or may not bring.
The other great thing about hope is that it has taught me to be grateful for what I have already, it’s likely I would not have those things without having hoped for them. Like good old Epicurus said “…Remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” A.x