Dressing up the Dictionary: Engulfed

Do you ever feel like your surroundings are engulfing you? I know I do. They influence how I think, how I feel and certainly how I dress. Over the years my style has adapted to the surroundings I have been in and as a result, it has changed invariably. I like exploring how an outfit can fit in with it or go against the grain.

When I was at an all girls secondary school, everything I wore was about fitting in with the people around me. I fell into the awful trap of brightly coloured Ralph Lauren polo’s-shoot me-that epitomises that private school “chic.” Moving on to sixth form college is where my style really started to come into it’s own, it has definitely evolved six years on, but they were the years that taught me a thing or two for the now. I was surrounded by kids whose bank accounts knew no bounds. An example of this was girls with a different Birkin bag for each day of the week, believe me, that is no exaggeration. My love for luxury goods was born here (and never died, LOL) and it marked the occasion I bought my first timeless piece, the Chanel 2.55 bag which I still use to this day, duh.

Being at MPW, the college in question, taught me so much about how my individuality could be expressed through my outfits. I wanted to have a part in all the luxury but I didn't necessarily have the funding for it like the rest. So, I learnt how to make any outfit I wore look luxe just by how I presented it. I practice the same thing today by mixing high end with the high street. Style is, in my mind, all about adapting to where you are while maintaining your individuality. Clothing aside, I definitely felt being at that college started to engulf my entire identity. With hindsight, I can see how it did that, but I can safely say because of that it has taught me not to be entirely eaten up by everything around me. Instead, I use my surroundings as muses to inspire how I want to look at any given occasion, place or time.

Speaking of feeling engulfed, for this weeks look I have gone for an elevated and up to date version of what I would have put together if I were at college. From the jacket to the boots, everything is from Zara, a definite favourite high street store. The accessories are where the luxe comes out to play, wearing the very Chanel bag I mentioned and have had for 10 years. I decided to visit the area the college is in, exploring all the mews’s once more to shoot for this post. A place I was once engulfed and encapsulated by, revisited with a new stance and a fresh set of eyes.

A.x

Shop the Look:

  1. Teddy Jacket, Zara

  2. Faux Leather Trousers, Zara similar here

  3. Boots, Zara

  4. Sunglasses, Le Specs

  5. Bag, Chanel Sloane St

Dressing up the Dictionary: Maintaining

If there’s one thing I find very difficult, it’s maintaining things.

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That’s because my mood disorder has a plan of it’s own. Cue journal excerpt dated 16.07.18: “It is really hard to maintain or upkeep the use of journalling… Even though I understand it’s cathartic value, I don’t like that it doesn't make things feel better instantly… The irony is I'm so obsessed with maintaining what I set out to do.” I pretty much left it there and didn't revisit the subject again, until now.

Why now? Because I feel at a loss with everything I am doing, and I am exhausted by my expectation of instant gratification. The same sentiment of wanting to feel better straight away has trickled down to my pursuit of becoming a lifestyle blogger. Honestly, I didn't think about what maintaining the process would really entail. I quickly learnt that there is a shady side to the community of lifestyle bloggers; nearly all of them are buying their followers and engagement. It explains why trying to drive in the traffic to my own website and Instagram has been so damn slow. We live in a world where everything is instantly obtainable, and it would seem cheating your way to get there is the norm.

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Excuse me, but I did not work that much harder to prove myself and my capabilities against all odds, to be told that paying my way into things is “all that matters.” Well, guess what? MY EXPERIENCE IS MY WORTH. If anything, the people I went to school with (think rich beyond realms imaginable and then quadruple that amount) have encouraged me to do the exact opposite of buying your way through life. Granted, it would be lovely to amble along Bond Street purchasing whatever I want, but I want that to be something I have TRULY earned. You don't go to work expecting to pay you're way through it. Everything you EARN (not buy on a dodgy website) pays for all that you do: Commuting, check. Morning coffee, check. Going out, check. Eating, check. The clothes on your back, check. Travelling, check. Car, check. Bills, check. Everything, check. Did you pay your boss to give you all that? *cough* Didn’t think so.

Maintaining my path to a blogging career is proving to be super hard, it will probably induce some kind of mental breakdown, but I am willing to take that risk. Haha, I just realised what being passionate about something really feels like, #growingup. It’s a combination of feeling sick and insanely high levels of determined all at once. I’ll continue feeling this way and putting all my hard work into what I do, because I believe I can do it WITHOUT LYING to everyone who decides to follow me. As a result, I will be thankful you're a human and not a damn bot.

*Sigh* All I know is if there is one thing I can maintain, it’s my honesty, both with myself and my followers. I would rather that then simply have a number (because that’s all it is) on my platforms just for appearance sake. If it fails, wearing all black-a tone that will never go out of fashion-and drinking coffee will have to be maintenance enough.

A.x

Shop the Look:

  1. Chunky Knit Sweater, H&M Similar here

  2. Faux Leather Skinny Trousers, Zara Similar here

  3. Suede Ankle Boots, Topshop

  4. Wool Biker Coat, Sandro

  5. Bag, Stella McCartney