Dressing up the Dictionary: Discomfort

I wish I could say that a little bit of discomfort doesn't hurt, but it does. Well, that depends entirely on what we are talking about, in this case I am referring to human interactions. They have the propensity to make you feel so painfully uncomfortable. I have decided that I am going to take to task my approach on what comfort means to me. Just like you can’t have light without seeing the dark, you can't gauge what you're truly comfortable with without going through something uncomfortable.

It’s no secret I am a major introvert, as introverted as one can get basically. As a result it doesn't really come naturally to me to know how to be in social settings. I mean, I don't do stupid things in place of “normal” things, it’s that I don't know what to do at all. Legiterally I’m the kinda gal you'll find quietly observing a situation rather than getting all up in your face. Through interacting with new people lately I have learnt that my INFJ self has built a massive protective wall around me. I don't even put myself out there enough to feel any discomfort, perpetually living in a bubble of my own making. 

Seriously, how do I know for sure that the comfort I have been living with for 25 years is real when it could be because I have been protecting myself against the things that have brought me such discomfort in the past?… I mean, is it REALLY comfort or is it fear? To answer simply; it is largely fear based. I am afraid of being hurt, being rejected and not being liked. So what do I do to not feel those things? Just avoid any situation which may cause them. Obvs. 

Alas, that will be no longer. I have slowly but surely been putting myself out there, doing things I wouldn't ordinarily, even when it has sent me into internal anxiety overdrive. Through any discomfort I am seeing how valuable it is to hold myself in high esteem and understand my boundaries. That within itself is a challenge, because it forces me to see outside of my black and white thinking. Which leads me to this words look; an expression of what is comfort to me in all its monochrome glory. While I embark upon my journey to a grey space, I can at least outwardly project what I am comfortable in, right?

A.x 

Dressing up the Dictionary: Expectations

It’s a New year and I have a whole new set of expectations. They can fall flat or be exceeded and until things happen you forever live in the unknown. I used to get the worst anxiety about a year ending and not knowing what was going to happen, but not this time. 2018, to quote Ariana Grande, thank you, next. I am so ready for all the challenges I will face this year, especially because I have found my footing with what I want for myself. So what is it exactly that I expect in the year to come, you ask?

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What I learnt last year is there really are two things which remain a constant: change and of course, your expectations. In fact, they totally work hand in hand. Everything you expect is always changing but you have them nonetheless. Of course, change is an inevitable fate and it doesn’t cease to exist. What 2018 really opened my eyes up to is the notion of “anything can happen.” It was the things I least expected (or didn’t at all for that matter) which changed so much for me, including what I expected from myself.

I expect to push myself outside of my comfort zones, to try and explore the things I love doing and not stay home so much (as cosy as it is), to learn, to love and most importantly I expect to be valued and to value myself.

I am excited to see where this year takes me, especially now that I have embarked on this blogging journey. At the beginning of 2018, I didn’t anticipate I would be doing what I am doing now. But by the end of 2019, with my new path and a clearer direction, I expect to see a growth from the hard work I put into writing (and shopping hahaha) in my pursuit to dress up the Dictionary. Plus, it means I get to hang out in très très chic places like this one (The Hari) which always makes for a great photo. For this words look I wanted to portray what expectations can look like in literal way. Just your every day jumper and jeans but with the addition of those red bottoms as a symbol of what I expect for myself; the very best.

A.x

Shop the Look:

  1. Pink Mohair Jumper, H&M

  2. Straight Leg Jeans, Topshop, Similar here

  3. Pointed Sling back heels, Christian Louboutin, Similar here

  4. Necklace assortment: Amelia Pendant - Cinco Store, Zodiac Pendant - Vanity&Rose, Mother of Pearl Pendant - Astley Clarke , Chanel Pendant from a selection at the Bond St Boutique

Dressing up the Dictionary: IRL

Doing it for the gram, every single day…

We are all living in this world via social media, more or less. It’s what “real life” has become and it’s all just a tap away on your phones screen. As a result, it’s really hard to distinguish what is actually real and what isn’t, the line is so blurry that we are thinking our own lives aren’t good enough because we are comparing ourselves to what we see of others all. the. time. It begs the question, how much of what I present to you is really true of myself?

Well, I want to keep things as real as possible, but I know there are certain tricks of the trade which mean I inevitably give off the impression my life is a certain way, when perhaps it might not be. That’s not to say that what I put out on social media didn’t happen, it just may not be happening that very moment.

So, for this blog my outfit and location is about keeping it really real with you. We shot on the streets I walk on everyday in West Dulwich where I live, and my outfit is one I wear all the time, whether a photo of it is taken or not. You can’t go wrong with all black and a touch of gold! With it being winter, this is my go to jacket and has been for years now. I practically live in it. All in all, and on a daily basis, I like clothes you can just chuck on without much thought and yet look totally chic anyway.

Yes, I curate an image of myself that I present to you. Yes, I work from home so you know what? Most of the time I am in loungewear (I think my next post will a guide to loungewear, as a self proclaimed expert in that department!). Yes, it’s me in the photographs, I am not catfishing your asses. YES I do own and cherish all the things you see, but they don’t make me who I am in my entirety. These photos don’t capture the nitty gritty, the struggles and the anxiety. I know I know, it’s unlikely anyone shares those things in their lives on social media because they are very personal. Nonetheless, I am telling you that they are there, nearly all of the time. Just because I share carefully chosen snippets of my life does not mean that I live a perfect one. Who does!?

A.x

Shop the look:

  1. Satin Jeans, Topshop (Now on sale!!!)

  2. Leather Shearling Jacket, similar here (H&M) and here (All Saints)

  3. Mini Leather bag, Balenciaga

  4. Boots, Gucci

Dressing up the Dictionary: Life

Life; the existential topic which often leads you down this vacuous hole of both wonder and disappointment along the way.

I’m definitely not even going to attempt to break down what it any time soon. Instead, you know how these days it’s a big deal to keep a gratitude diary? Well I want to share with you some of the things I am grateful for in my life.

If it weren't for the quirks that make me laugh until my asthmatic wheeze is in full force, I would be a pretty miserable soul through and through. I am so grateful for my sense of humour, over the past year it’s really kept me going. Queue Reggae Shark. If you know, you know. So, ordinarily everything I wear I source carefully and think about in depth before purchasing, but on this occasion the Reggae Shark t-shirt was a complete no brainer and I needed it immediately. My friend and I stumbled upon him in the realms of Youtube, and found ourselves in total hysterics. Now he lives in my wardrobe, and I am totally happy for him to be a part of my ever expanding (seriously, running out of space guys) clothing collection.

Verheyen London Emerald Long Line Leopard Print Coat

Something I am learning ever so slowly but surely is to believe in myself and my capabilities. Patience is a virtue as is known so widely, and I am holding on to that notion because in time I hope my capabilities pay off, literally. Now I've embarked upon my journey as a blogger I am understanding the feeling of believing in what I do with full force. This is cemented by insanely beautiful brands like Verheyen London taking interest in what I have to offer, and I am really thankful and proud to be wearing their stunning Long Line Leopard print coat in emerald for this shoot.

This outfit is a representation of my life as I know it now. I am feeling the growth in my self esteem more and more (who knew a luxury coat could do that for you!?). This coat is an emblem , of positivity which I don't always believe is there, but I need to despite it hiding in the shadows. If I could summarise in any way what life is about, it’s a matter of taking things as they are and in my stride while knowing that having patience will always pay off. After all, you can only see where life is taking you as it unravels with each step, living in the present one day at a time. To the unknown! Of which I am grateful for what it teaches me as my life unfolds.

A.x

Shop the Look:

P.s. For a dose of total random hilariousness, here is the aforementioned and legendary Reggae Shark!

  1. Green Leopard Print Coat, Verheyen London

  2. Reggae Shark T-shirt, Ebay

  3. Lady Dior Lambskin Large bag, Dior

  4. Pointed Silver Cap Ankle Boots, Topshop

Dressing up the Dictionary: Optimism

“Optimism," said Cacambo, "What is that?" "Alas!" replied Candide, "It is the obstinacy of maintaining that everything is best when it is worst.” Candide, Voltaire

Optimism is a strange thing, to me at least. I don't consider myself to be an altogether optimistic person but it would seem that’s only really the case when I look at my life as a whole. It presents itself in smaller doses, like when I take on a task, I know the end goal and I am optimistic about reaching it whether that be through my blogging, working or even going shopping (because, duh, my ever expanding wardrobe doesn't exist because I am negative about how I want to look).

Working on the bigger picture, however, is going to take some serious amount of time. My cynical nature overrides my optimistic one when I think about the big goals for my future. It doesn’t help when you live with a condition which constantly throws you off balance or when everything going on for you is shat on by the universe, damn you seagull like universe, s@%!ting on everything. But I suppose that’s the point, courtesy of Voltaire (see quote above) it is in fact maintaining that you can see the best even through the worst.

Gucci Boots and Zara Red Patent Biker Jacket

When I think of the word itself, the colour red blankets my mind. Being optimistic carries this sense of fieriness with a side order of passion, which screams all hues of bright and vibrant red. It’s bold and headstrong, you know exactly what you want when you have it and you will do anything to obtain or achieve it in spite of any obstacles and all of life’s persistent twists and turns. So, for this weeks look I wanted to capture how I feel about optimism and how I can best represent what it means to me.

It’s finally jacket and coat season and I couldn’t be happier! I think it’s safe to say that outerwear can either make or break your outfit. I am obsessed (to my mothers distain) with buying them, filling out 3 wardrobes in my own home and not to mention those hanging up at my dad’s place. This red patent jacket is perfect for my look tied to the word optimism. Clearly, having this many coats and jackets really pays off, lol. I’m teaming it with an understated ensemble of a black knitted turtleneck, dark skinny jeans and the most boss boots I have purchased this winter from Gucci.

All the darkness underneath the bold and the bright is my scepticism and the red is all of my optimism. You get me? I hope so.

A.x

Shop the Look:

  1. Red Patent Jacket, Zara - Similar here

  2. Black Turtleneck Jumper, H&M

  3. Dark Wash Skinny Jeans, 7 For All Mankind

  4. Ankle Boots, Gucci

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